Sunday, November 22

horse shoe up my ass?

Being here in L.a has brought up many interesting conversations between my friends, family and acquaintances. My decision to move to L.a to write for two months or maybe even longer has been met with many verbal expressions of "Wow, you're so lucky, that you can do that" or a sarcastic, " It must be nice!" or my favourite one is "Good stuff always happens to you!"
And I've had to really sit down and think about these statements because I realize that most people function from a place of good things only happen to "certain people" or only "lucky people" have good lives. And I've been thinking lately am I really more "lucky" than most~ My best friend always jokes that, I have a horse shoe up my ass!
And in some moments I have experienced a tremendous sense of guilt around my so called "luck"~ especially when people express to me, "Oh what a life of luxury you lead, you're going away to write for two months while I'm slaving away here!"
Yet I realize I have nothing to feel guilty about. I'm not more "lucky" than most. What I am is a visionary, I put my life into motion to get what I want. I don't make my life control me I control my life. I don't think things "just happen".... I think you have to set things in motion for them to happen. You have a choice in what happens to your life! A choice!
And I know many of you will argue this point with me and that's fine-bring it on!! Because if you truly believed you had a choice in what happens in your life it would force you to really start to make some changes! So of course it's much easier for you to sit and dwell on the "lucky folks." * yes i know that statement is going to hit a nerve! I'm just keeping IT REAL!
Because I believe most of us function from a place of REACTING to life's circumstances instead of being PROACTIVE in our own lives. We wait for our lives to start, wait for "lady luck" to walk by so we can grab her, if we are "lucky" enough! And of course we always think maybe... some day I'll do that......SOME DAY?? No today is the day!
I've made a promise to myself and it's my daily mantra, that I'm going to live the life that I want. And the life that I want, is to be able to go away for two months to write in hot weather! It's as simple as that. And no, throughout my life I didn't have anymore "lucky" breaks than anyone else.
I was born into a working class family, raised by a single mom, lived quite an "ordinary" life and nothing was ever given to me that I haven't worked hard for. And I think if you ask any of my friends and family who knew me before I became "The" trey anthony I think all of them would talk about my tremendous work ethic. How I will do the work necessary and then some to get things done or to have the things that I want! One of my favourite sayings that my grandmother always stated to me was, " To have the life that most people want, you must be willing to do the work that most people won't."

And I have done the "work" and continue to do so. Some of my jobs have included cleaning toilets, emptying garbages, cleaning people's floors on my hands and knees, running for coffee, picking up people's dry cleaning, cleaning people's homes, I've worked in a sock factory on an assembly line during the week so I could have my weekends free to do standup at comedy clubs, I did coat check at a night club till 4am in the morning and took the bus home, alone, scared and tired~ I have done backbreaking, humbling jobs to get to where I am today....... trust me when the bio pic comes out about my life you will be surprised at what "work" I have done..... And yes I also realize that many of us continue to toil at these jobs daily and I'm "lucky" that I no longer have to do these things....

Yet, I've worked very hard for everything that I have. And when my partner and I made the decision to go away for two months, we put the wheels in motion to make that happen. So we chose to work twelve-fourteen hour days, so we could "bank" the necessary money for this trip. Earlier in the year, we chose to give up an expensive mortgage on a very convenient, beautiful, downtown condo and move to a smaller, simpler home, where it took me nearly 45 mins to get into work and yes I took the TTC! The Wilson bus to be exact because it was cheaper than driving into downtown every day and paying for parking. And yes it was "embarrassing" for me to bump into fans on the TTC bus! But I put my ego aside and did what was necessary. And I had to question myself on why I felt embarrassed..... I was doing what I had to do to make a dream come true. I did all of that, so we could "save" the money for L.a. I also chose to not buy expensive designer jeans or shoes and went to Zellers to buy many an outfit for opening night events! Actually the top that I was wearing when I met Oprah cost $14.99 at Zellers, the leather jacket cost me $25 and it was second hand, or to make myself better I'll call it vintage! lol! And I wore it proudly at the Toronto Film Festival, the same festival where some of my industry peers were getting designer gowns made! And I got many a compliment on my outfit!

I did all of this because I knew where I wanted to be at the end of the year. My friends joke a lot about how "cheap" I am. And yes I am cheap because my "cheapness" affords me the life that I want to live..... And I regularly go over my personal and business budget so I can cut out things in order, to later have the things that I truly want. I don't keep up with the "Jones'" I keep up with me!
And most of all before I got to L.a I daily visioned and manifested that I would be in L.a writing outside in the hot sunshine. I chose to see the abundance and not the lack. I didn't complain that I wouldn't have the money to do it. I just focused on what I had and how could I make this possible? And I truly think that is the difference between me and a lot of people. Even in the days when I had $20 in my bank account, or while working as an intern for the Chris Rock Show in New York and only being able to "treat" myself to a $1 hot dog for lunch once a week, I always focused on the abundance not the lack. And I worked with what I had to make things happen and I always envisioned my life the way that I wanted to live it!

So a new year is coming and I hear many people around me making all these grand statements of, "Well in the new year, I'm going to do this, or that...." I think to myself, why not start now? Live your life. Live the life you want to live. Stop making excuses and thinking good things only happen to certain people and not you! Be thankful for what you have, feel blessed for every opportunity, however, create more opportunities for yourself and I would encourage you to fill your life with positive thoughts, positive books, positive people and manifest the life that you want. It is possible to have the life you want~I'm living proof of that.


Umar said...

thanks! a nice reminder for a day i may be having doubts that i am indeed on the right track!

Jordan said...

Wow, this is an incredibly inspirational post. I'm saving this and adding this to my list of things to look at when I think twice about waking up for a class that I KNOW I should be going to or when I decide to take the easy way out on something that I know isn't built for the easy way out.

Thanks Trey!

m.v.d said...

all the power to you-
not many female artists from toronto could admit such honest and admirable resolve.
thanks x.

Lisa Michelle said...

Yes Yes YES! Thank you, trey!

Allayz said...

Thank you for being our mirror Trey. And not just a comfortably blurry one, but the the HD one that says 'Wake Up! Don't look, but SEE. And now that you can see, go out and DO."

THANK YOU for keeping the fire going!!!

Lisa said...

yes! loved this Trey. i am going to practice making 'luckier' decisions where it matters most... :)

Anonymous said...

Thank you for mentoring and being so honest.

Rennae said...

This blog was completely inspirational to me.I love your honesty and admire you even more, for "keeping it real!!".As a childhood friend I can certainly attest to your hard work..Big ups Trey!!

Cayle said...

Hey Trey, more power to you - thanks for sharing these thoughts on your blog and for alerting me to I know why I haven't been able to reach you, you are writing in L.A. brilliant!
I concur with everything you have said about what matters. I am currently excited about the new website for my film project: I am experimenting with internet outreach/marketing. I just got elected to Actra Council and went to Ottawa to lobby on behalf of Canadian TV and Ei for actors...amazing!

Sherika said...

Hi Trey,I love your work.

Its always good to know that people of your caliber feel the way you do. Knowing that getting to where you want in life is not just "luck or chance" it's about working hard for what you want and believing in yourself.

This post was very inspirational keep up the good work Trey.

Tash said...

Thank you Trey! Lord knows I needed to hear these words exactly as you have written them.

mznubianq said...

Thanks for has really put a spin on how I view the items on my task list.

Thanks again!

Anonymous said...

I'm taking one of my many Hats off to you Trey for posting this message! lol

Can't tell you how many times I've heard people say to me, we're not worried about you, you ALWAYS get a job, or you are just lucky that way.

When I look back on my life and what I came from to get where I am today and how hard I worked as a single parent working a full time and part time job together, while juggling part time studies I know that whatever I have been blessed to receive today and on into my future is well deserved because I worked hard!

I am also a very firm believer in positive thinking and plotting your own future course "Designing your life" in your mind, then planting those seeds down on paper and verbalizing and living that dream every single day in a positive way until it inevitably comes to greet you.

This has been my testimony for the last year and I am sticking by it. I have done a lot of "personal housecleaning" getting rid of the negative vibes and people in my life that don't seem to want more for themselves and thus couldn't possibly want to see more abundance for me either.

I tell you that spring clean has made room for an abundance of blessings to flow my way and I am grateful everyday for each of these blessings.

I know what I want and I am making definite strides to get there and I won't apologize to anyone for benefiting from putting in hard work.

I'm openly receiving all of my blessings today and forever. I will no longer stand in my own way, blocking the many blessings that are coming my way. Fear of not succeeding in my true passions be gone, self-doubt be gone, insecurities be gone, financial strain be gone and negative energy that has no place in my life be gone!

I only have room going forward for all things that are positive, uplifting, motivating and fulfilling to the mind....

Do your thing Ms. Trey you are a definite inspiration to us all.

Thanks for keepin' it real.

Progressive Women
Success ABC's -

truthaccordingtotrey said...

Thanks to everyone for sharing and responding to my blog! I got many emails, and f/book responses as well. I'm hoping to just keep it "Real", thus inspire others. I want womyn especially to feel that anything is possible, we must dream bigger than our circumstances! So i wish all of you continued GREATNESS and Keep doing your thang. Lets support each other but most of all support ourselves to keep on track! blessings

the.kisser said...

thank you for such an inspirational post. life is definitely what you make it, and i hope everyone will get that message before it's too late.


Nthakong J-C Masithela said...

Love Love Love!!!!! We need to start thinking this way for people to progress in Life.

I preach most of what you are saying here to all my friends. "Believe the unbelievable and chase you dreams!"

Thanks for this Top Note.