MONDAY MOTIVATION: Delete the Digital Drama From Your Life

Have you ever had to pause and take a moment of silence (to calm yourself) after reading someone's Facebook comment or Twitter status? Or maybe you had to delete their comment all together from one of your social media accounts? Well, digital drama and cyber bullying have become an all too real occurrence these days with the continually growing popularity of blogs and social media. People have used online to express rude or hateful comments that they would most likely never say to you in person as they hide behind their send buttons. In these cases you can either develop a thick skin and ignore the cyber hate or you can find a way to take a (personal or public) stand against it.

12 year old Willow Smith has joined Seventeen Magazine's "Delete the Drama" campaign as a celebrity activist. The campaign seeks to empower young women to disengage from cyberbullying by deleting harsh and mean comments they see on their Twitter, Facebook and Instagram pages.

I've had a few times where I have read negative comments towards me on my social media feeds or noticed hurtful opinions that I was sensitive to. It made me realize how important it is to clear your space (even online) of any negative clutter. Relieve yourself of having any negativity in your digital view or engaging in it.

This week I challenge all of you to clear your digital drama: delete negative people off of your friends lists (it's not about the number of "friends" you have!), follow one less celebrity gossip blog, and/or don't contribute to any negative back and forth in the comment sections of a blog post or social media feed. 

Find ways to protect your spirit from hurtful words and negativity because sometimes the best way to battle negativity is to keep it moving and ignore the hate.

I posted this on my Facebook page and thought I would share this quote again because it is so relevant and a worthy reminder:

"If we understood the power of our thoughts, we would guard them more closely. If we understood the awesome power of our words, we would prefer silence to almost anything negative. In our thoughts and words we create our own weaknesses and our own strengths. Our limitations and joys begin in our hearts. We can always replace negative with positive"

- Betty Eadie.

Have you experienced any digital hate? What do you do when people say hurtful things to you online via social media?

Happy Monday!

I Am Not My Hair: Jada Pinkett Smith Pens A Letter to Those Who Criticize Willow's Cropped Hair Cut

I just love the Smith family - their talent, ambition, work ethic, the love that they have for each other and I love that the kids are allowed to go through a phase of just figuring out who they are without tough restrictions from their parents. Jada's parenting style has been criticized numerous times in the past as she has chosen to not dictate how her children should dress and style their hair. I debated a few issues in regards to her parenting style not too long ago, but one thing that I refuse to argue is people taking offense to Willow's shaved head.

We should be celebrating Willow for her apparent non-attachment to her locks. Her fearlessness when it comes to hair is inspiring because not too many children never mind womyn are brave enough to rock a shaved head while putting their face completely on display. As womyn, especially black womyn, we hide behind our hair. The longer and fuller our hair, the more beautiful and feminine we feel. Remember being young and finding ways to wrap a towel or sheet over your hair so that the length was cascading over your shoulders like hair? We would wear it all day as kids, flipping it over our shoulders mimicking the way we see women with long hair on tv do.This attachment to long hair and ideals of feminine beauty has gone on for generations, so it is amazing to see such a young girl reject it.

Instead of criticizing her, we should be promoting her actions. Not just for her but for other young girls and womyn to see that as cliche as it may sound and India Arie sang it best, I am not my hair. There has to be an absolute freedom in looking in the mirror and the first thing that you see is face, not hair. With short, cropped hair you can't hide from yourself. That bravery is what I appreciate in Willow and all of you short, cropped and pixie haired beauties.

Check out the letter that Jada posted on Facebook in response to people's criticism of Willow:

A letter to a friend…


This subject is old but I have never answered it in its entirety. And even with this post it will remain incomplete.

The question why I would LET Willow cut her hair. First the LET must be challenged. This is a world where women,girls are constantly reminded that they don’t belong to themselves; that their bodies are not their own, nor their power or self determination. I made a promise to endow my little girl with the power to always know that her body, spirit and her mind are HER domain. Willow cut her hair because her beauty, her value, her worth is not measured by the length of her hair. It’s also a statement that claims that even little girls have the RIGHT to own themselves and should not be a slave to even their mother’s deepest insecurities, hopes and desires. Even little girls should not be a slave to the preconceived ideas of what a culture believes a little girl should be.

More to come. Another day.

J

Well said Jada and I applaud you for this! I'm taking notes for if I have a little girl in the future. I want her to feel beautiful and strong regardless of what her hair looks like and what society uses to measure her worth.

What are your thoughts on Jada's letter and Willow's short hair? Would you allow your kids to sport a cropped 'do or is that a decision that should be made when they get a bit older? Meet me in the comment section, would love to hear your thoughts!

Happy Friday All!!

Happy birthday Jada Pinkett Smith!

Happy birthday to Jada Pinkett Smith!

Can you believe Jada Pinkett Smith turned 41 yesterday? If you have been following her career since the 90s, like I have, then you’ll probably be just as amazed to realize how far the woman who first stole our hearts as Jason’s Lyric has really come.

Aside from her acting career Jada is now a producer, director, author, business-woman and a singer-songwriter for a metal band. And of course, she is one of the world’s most famous wives and mothers. And it is the way that she and her husband Will have managed to balance all of these roles that makes me admire her most.

This week, the Smiths released a music video starring all 3 of their kids (Jaden, Willow and Trey – Jada’s stepson). What blows my mind is that the video was produced by mom Jada with support from dad Will. The last time a song came out with so many family members involved may have been the Jacksons!

This isn’t the first time that the Smiths have collaborated with their kids on a project. Their son Jaden starred in the remake of the Karate Kid, which they produced, and also starred alongside his dad in The Pursuit of Happyness. Willow has also starred in movies with her parents – I am Legend and Madagascar 3.

The cool thing is that you can see that Jada and Will have allowed their kids to create their own paths. They don’t seem like stage parents who force their kids to follow in their career paths but they have definitely given their children the confidence, opportunities and space to express themselves in their own ways. Whether it’s their music or their style, the Smith kids don’t conform to what others may expect of them. And they and their parents have been criticized for it. (When Willow posted a twitter picture showing off a tongue ring twitterverse went crazy. Willow later said the tongue ring was a fake. ) But it seems like their kids are enjoying themselves and from what we see so far, they are really mature,respectful and well-spoken.

I for one think Jada is a great example of a successful womyn who emulates strength, beauty and love. I can’t wait to see what the future holds for her and her family! Check out their new video and let me know what you think. Are you a fan of the Smith family, or Jada herself?

I Am Me: Heartfelt Reminder To Be Yourself by Willow Smith

Willow Smith just dropped her newest video 'I Am Me."  It is an unapologetic proclamation to everyone to be comfortable in their own skin.  You can see and feel the passion oozing out of this video.  It's refreshing to see such truth in music nowadays.

To think that an 11 year old has to defend herself to the media telling them that "your validation is just not that important to me."  It's so heartfelt and is a 'much watch' and a 'must share' in my opinion.  We all need to remember that we need to just be ourselves and “be honest, cuz ain’t nobody got time for that.”

I think that more parents need to allow their kids to be who they are not who the parents want them to be!  Cheers to Will and Jada for allowing their daughter to express herself how she she feels fit.  

"I am me, I am me.  And that's all I can be"

Side Note: Willow Smith is Will Smith's mini me! haha  I can't get over how much she looks like her father.  I see a likkle glimpse of Jada in there, but that girl is all WILL! haha.  She even has some of his nuances and it's crazy to watch.